14 Phrases Parents Used to Say That Wouldn’t Fly Today
This list shows 14 things parents used to say that would not be okay today, as parenting has become more careful and understanding.
- Daisy Montero
- 3 min read
Parenting has changed a lot over the years. Some of the things parents used to say are now seen as outdated or even hurtful. This list goes through 14 of those old-school phrases and shows what today’s parents are doing instead.
1. “Because I said so.”
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This authoritative phrase was once a go-to for ending debates with children. However, it dismisses a child’s curiosity and need for understanding. Modern parenting encourages explaining the reasons behind decisions to foster trust and critical thinking.
2. “Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about.”
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This phrase invalidates a child’s emotions and can instill fear in them. Acknowledging and addressing a child’s feelings promotes emotional intelligence and a secure parent-child relationship.
3. “Why can’t you be more like your sibling?”
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Comparing children can lead to feelings of inadequacy and sibling rivalry. Modern parenting emphasizes celebrating each child’s unique strengths and fostering individual growth.
4. “You’re too sensitive.”
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Labeling a child as “too sensitive” can discourage them from expressing emotions. Encouraging open emotional expression helps children develop resilience and self-awareness.
5. “Don’t talk back to me.”
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This phrase shuts down communication and discourages children from expressing their thoughts and feelings. Modern approaches value respectful dialogue, teaching children to voice opinions constructively.
6. “Boys don’t cry.”
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This gendered phrase discourages emotional expression in boys. Encouraging all children to express feelings fosters emotional health and breaks down harmful stereotypes.
7. “You’re being a drama queen.”
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Dismissing a child’s emotions as overreacting can harm their self-esteem. Validating their feelings encourages healthy emotional development.
8. “I’m so proud of you.”
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While well-intentioned, this phrase can shift focus to seeking external approval. Encouraging children to take pride in their own achievements fosters internal motivation and self-confidence.
9. “Good job!”
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Overusing generic praise like “Good job” can lead children to seek constant validation. Offering specific feedback helps children understand their accomplishments and encourages growth.
10. “Don’t be a baby.”
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This phrase can shame children for expressing vulnerability. Modern parenting encourages acknowledging and supporting children’s emotions to build resilience.
11. “You’ll never change.”
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Telling a child they won’t change can be discouraging and hinder personal growth. Encouraging a growth mindset helps children believe in their ability to improve and adapt.
12. “You’re embarrassing me.”
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This phrase can make children feel ashamed and self-conscious. Addressing behavior privately and constructively helps maintain a child’s dignity and encourages better understanding.
13. “Children Should Be Seen and Not Heard”
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This old idea kept kids silent in the name of respect. Today, many parents encourage kids to speak up and share their thoughts. Having a voice is now seen as a good thing.
14. “You’re Fine”
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Parents used to brush off pain or feelings quickly with this phrase. Now, more parents listen and check in to see what is really going on. Kids feel heard instead of dismissed.