17 Phrases Our Grandparents Said That Make No Sense Today
A quirky list of outdated expressions that once made perfect sense — but now just leave us scratching our heads.
- Chris Graciano
- 4 min read
Our grandparents had a language all their own. These were filled with sayings rooted in a different time. While they once offered wisdom, humor, or caution, many of these phrases sound downright bizarre today. Let’s decode 17 old-timey expressions that have modern folks asking, “Wait, what?”
1. “Don’t take any wooden nickels”
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This old warning was meant to be a caution against being duped. Back when counterfeit tokens were a thing, it was practical advice.
2. “Mad as a hatter”
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Inspired by mercury poisoning in 19th-century hat makers, this meant someone was completely out of their mind. The backstory is darker than the goofy phrase suggests.
3. “Heavens to Betsy!”
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An expression of surprise that feels like it came out of a black-and-white movie. No one knows who Betsy is — or why the heavens were involved. Still, it’s fun to say with dramatic flair.
4. “Hold your horses”
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Used to mean “slow down” or “be patient,” this phrase comes from the days of horse-drawn everything. Makes perfect sense — if you’re in a buggy.
5. “Don’t let the bedbugs bite”
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This bedtime sendoff was meant to be sweet, but it sounds a little unsettling. No one wants to think about bugs crawling around at night.
6. “She’s the bee’s knees”
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A high compliment back in the jazz era, this phrase was used to praise someone as top-notch. Why bees have knees worth bragging about is anyone’s guess.
7. “A feather in your cap”
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This meant an achievement or honor to be proud of, like a badge of distinction. Originating from military tradition or hunting, it’s not something you hear often now.
8. “Hunky-dory”
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Meant everything was fine or going smoothly, especially in the 1940s and ‘50s. The origin was murky, possibly naval slang. Today, it feels too cheerful to be taken seriously.
9. “Let’s blow this popsicle stand”
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Time to leave — usually with enthusiasm. It painted a fun, vivid picture, though no one really knew where it came from. Still occasionally heard, but mostly in retro sitcoms.
10. “You look like the cat that ate the canary”
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This phrase describes someone who looks smug or suspiciously pleased. It’s a little dark when you picture it literally. Nowadays, it’s more confusing than clever.
11. “More than you can shake a stick at”
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This was used to describe an overwhelming amount of something — money, chores, anything. It came from old shepherding or battle references.
12. “In a pig’s eye”
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This was a snarky way to say “No way” or “Yeah, right.” It’s blunt, funny, and vaguely insulting. The image of a pig’s eye just adds to the confusion.
13. “Scarce as hen’s teeth”
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Since hens don’t have teeth, this meant something was incredibly rare. Makes sense once explained, but it sounds baffling at first.
14. “Quit your lollygagging”
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This was how your grandpa told you to stop wasting time. It meant dawdling or moving too slowly. Today, it just sounds like a made-up word from a kids’ book.
15. “Close, but no cigar”
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Originally used at carnival games when cigars were prizes, it meant you were almost right. Smoking prizes aged poorly, but the phrase stuck around. Now, it’s just puzzling for anyone under 40.
16. “Burning the midnight oil”
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Back when oil lamps were the only light source, this phrase meant working late. These days, we’re burning LEDs. Still, the meaning holds, just without the kerosene smell.
17. “Colder than a witch’s [insert body part]”
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This colorful way of describing freezing temps is crass and oddly specific. Everyone heard their grandpa say it, and no one knew what it really meant.