20 New Parent Struggles Nobody Talks About

On social media, parents are often shown in a good light, with pictures of them having fun and being close to their kids. However, parents deal with many hidden daily issues that aren’t often discussed. Kids and teens have secret problems, like not getting enough sleep or feeling wrong about not being “perfect.” These aren’t exciting things to discuss on social media, but most parents must deal with them.

1. The Heavy Mental Load

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Being a parent is a steady, invisible weight that never goes away. It’s not just taking care of your child; you must also remember their doctor visits, ensure they eat well, and work out their schedules. Despite being tiring, this is often overlooked since it’s not something you can “see.”

2. Not getting enough sleep becomes normal for you

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You quickly learn that not getting enough sleep isn’t just a phase. It stays with you for months or even years, hurting your health, mood, and ability to be patient. It might take your body a while to catch up, even after your child starts sleeping through the night.

3. Being guilty of everything you do

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You will always feel bad about working from home or somewhere else. Many parents feel like they don’t spend enough time or do enough for their kids. Being hard on yourself all the time can make you lose faith in yourself and your love of parenting. 

4. The Need to Get It All Together

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People tell parents they should have perfect kids, clean homes, and good jobs, but that’s unrealistic. Behind closed doors, most parents say they need help with their kids’ chores and feel like they’re always running late. It can be lonely when everyone posts videos of the best parts of their “perfect” life. 

5. You have to put your personal life on hold

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When you become a parent, you may lose your own identity because you put your child’s wants ahead of your own. When you place your child first, you may have to give up hobbies, friends, and even self-care. Even though this doesn’t make you a bad parent, it does make you wonder when you’ll be “you” again.

6. The Never-Ending Noise

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The noise level can be too much, from the alarms going off early in the morning to the nonstop talking all day. Getting some peace is hard, even in the bathroom by yourself. After this mental overload, you might feel tired and want peace.

7. Struggling with Feelings After Giving Birth

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A lot of new parents go through mental upheaval after giving birth, but it’s not always talked about. Changes in hormones, not getting enough sleep, and taking on new tasks can all make you feel sad, anxious, or even angry. Going through this change is hard, and it usually takes longer than anyone thinks to overcome it mentally.

8. The Need for Babysitters All the Time

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As a parent, the idea of a last-minute friend night or date night seems almost impossible. It’s always hard to find stable child care, and after having kids, many parents feel cut off from their friends and family. Sometimes, the need for a babysitter seems impossible to solve.

9. Taking care of your health while raising kids

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Parents often prioritize their health because they worry about their children. Busy parents frequently skip doctor visits, do not exercise, and neglect their mental health. Because of this, they usually feel like they have no energy left to care for anyone else.

10. The worry that you’re not a “good enough” parent

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It’s common to feel like you’re making mistakes when raising your child, taking part in their life, or making choices. This fear makes many parents doubt themselves and question everything they do, from how to manage their kids to which school to send them to. Being a parent who tries to be “perfect” can be very hard on your emotions.

11. Feeling like time has passed you by

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When you have kids, time goes by so quickly. With work, cleaning, childcare, and all the other things that need to be done, it can feel like the days fly by. This can make people feel lost and long for the “before” times when things were more accessible to plan.

12. Important events in childhood can be overwhelming

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Meals like “first words” and “first steps” are exciting but present their problems. Parents often feel like they must celebrate every little thing their kids do, even if they are too tired or stressed to do so. It’s also hard to deal with the fact that your child is growing up too fast.

13. Always feeling like you’re behind

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You always feel that you must remember everything but still forget, no matter how hard you try to keep up. Parents often feel like they’re always playing catch-up, whether they failed to remember to pack a snack, lose a permission slip, or do not have time to read that parenting book. It can take a lot of work to keep up with everything with all the things on your list.

14. What it means for your relationship

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Parenting can stress even the best relationships because of the lack of sleep, stress, and different parenting styles. There may not be as much closeness between you and your partner as there used to be when you both had kids. Couples can quickly lose touch and drift apart if they don’t try to keep the connection going.

15. The Loss of Personalized Space

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When your kids are always around you, privacy is a thing of the past. Not even the bathroom is safe anymore. Personal space is hard to come by when someone needs something from you, or your child walks in while you shower. Sometimes, being so close all the time can feel like suffocation.

16. The Constant Pressure on Money

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It costs a lot to raise a child, and many parents think about money all the time. Every stage of parenthood brings new money problems that are easy to forget until they happen. This stress can not only change how you live, but it can also hurt your mental health.

17. How to Handle Advice You Didn’t Ask for

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Everyone seems to have an idea of how you should teach your kid. Advice you should have asked for can be overwhelming, whether from family, strangers, or well-meaning friends. Parents often feel like they’re making bad decisions or being judged, even when trying their best.

18. The Need to Make Every Moment Wonderful

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Making every family moment unique and memorable is a big part of modern parenting culture. There’s an unspoken pressure to make every event memorable, whether a birthday party, a weekend trip, or a quiet night at home. This can make daily life feel like you’re always trying to be perfect.

19. The Fear of Being a Parent Alone

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For many, having a partner who works long hours or being a single parent can be very hard. Doing everything yourself, from getting ready for bed to doing chores around the house, can be tiring. It’s hard to deal with when you have to carry the whole load, even with help.

20. Not taking care of yourself

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You only have a little time or energy when you’re always caring for others. Because something always needs your attention, caring for yourself seems like a faraway dream. So many parents forget how to put their needs first because they’ve put everyone else’s needs before theirs for so long.

• Tags:
• New Parent
• Child
• Struggles
• Worries
• Fears